About three years ago, I decided to buy a new futon mattress because my old one was too soft and lumpy.
Because I have allergies, I also decided to spring for a CleanRest Elite mattress cover. This was very expensive, but I figured it was worth it, since it promised to let me enjoy a bed that was neither filled with dust mites nor wrapped in an uncomfortable, unbreathable plastic mattress cover (my previous two choices).
Last fall, I returned from a trip to wake up with horrible allergy symptoms. These had gradually gotten worse as over the years, and it was only three weeks of being on the road and camping that made me realize how bad my own bedroom had gotten. That was at my old place, where the bedroom has wall-to-wall carpeting.
Carpet is evil for allergies, so I blamed the carpet and started sleeping on the couch in the living room (which has bamboo flooring instead of carpet). My theory was proved correct (or so I thought) because my symptoms immediately disappeared. Since at that point I knew I was going to be there for only a few more months, I just decided to continue sleeping in the living room (that couch folds out into a bed) for the time being.
Last week, I set up my bed at the new place and spend a night in it. In the morning, I felt horrible. The room reeked of a mixture of eau de locker room and dust — the stench of dust mites and their excrement. That’s happened before, and the cure is to wash all my bedding, so I proceed to do just that.
But the problems persist. That leaves one variable. I purchase a cheap, uncomfortable, unbreathable vinyl mattress cover and install it. The stench abates a little. But enough seeps out the end where the zipper is to make me miserable at night.
So I dig the lumpy old futon out of storage. I had planned on throwing it in the dumpster, but never had. It’s never been encased in anything except an old-fashioned, unbreathable mattress cover. And with that mattress on my bed frame, the problem disappears.
So it appears that CleanRest’s claim that their mattress covers are both breathable and impermeable to dust mites is only half-true: they are indeed breathable.
Now I’m still planning on throwing a mattress in the dumpster, only it’s not the mattress I had originally anticipated.
Fuck you very much, CleanRest.
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